Retrospective - LSAT (Part 1)

Last year this time I had just took the LSAT and was waiting for the results!! 

WHAT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES!!!!

My history with the LSAT is a long and complicated relationship.  Some people like to say that they had a love/hate relationship with it.  Not me, I have a hate/hate relationship with the sucka!!

Back when I was a junior in college (2002/2003) and decided that law school was the next step in my quest for world domination (okay maybe that was too much LOL), I headed to the Internet to see what steps I needed to take in order to attend law school.  I obtain this wonderful timeline (which is a great thing for planners) and one of the first items was this thing called "Law School Admissions Test".  So me being the nerd that I am, I read up on EVERYTHING LSAT and headed to the book store to obtain a LSAT study book. 

In January 2003, I went to the LSAC website and registered for the June 2003 exam.  When did I decide to study for this exam?  TWO WEEKS BEFORE THE EXAM!!!!  I didn't know this back then, but there is NO SUCH THING as studying for this exam.  Nevertheless I aced it!!  Well...... not necessarily aced it, but I did receive the highest score out of all of the people who I went to college with.  If you know what  I made, I don't know what that says about my college and/or the people that go to it.  LOL!!

Sooooo five years later in 2008, I decided that I am really serious about going back to law school.  I did my due diligence and found out that I needed to take the exam again.  Once again I registered for the exam and once again I did NOTHING to prepare myself.  I convinced myself that I was ready to ace this exam.

I was like, "Hey!  I didn't prepare myself last time and I did okay, I should be okay this time. Right?"

No.  I did horrible,  actually the worst you can do, I did THAT...... I was so ashamed of myself and was actually convincing myself that it was time to give up this law school dream and move on to something else.

In the beginning of 2009, I was having my "annual work evaluation" meeting, and the new person over my department wanted to know a little about me.  After the obvious things (family, college, hobbies), we went on to discuss my short attendance in law school.  I went on to give her the scripted version (I had a lot things going on at the time and I decided to just sit out for awhile), but for some reason she could sense the bulls**t.  Without saying that I was a liar, she made me comfortable enough with her that for the first time I was honest and could actually say it out loud, "I flunked out of law school".

Then she said something that just clicked, but for some reason, I cannot remember the exact quote, LOL!!  All I can say is that after that meeting I came out with a new mind frame! Especially since she offered to pay (well have the company pay) for me to take the exam AGAIN and to pay for a prep course.  I never had someone (outside of family and friends) have such confidence in me.

Now this is when my journey REALLY BEGAN....

STAY TUNED FOR PART TWO!!!!

Summer before school starts - What shall I do???

With summer officially starting tomorrow and less than 60 days until school starts (56 to be exact), I feel I have so much to do!!

• I need to sit down and establish a concrete budget and stick to it.

• Get adjusted to the new job I will start some time this month or at the beginning of July.

• Establishing a better work wardrobe.

• Move in with my friend (driving at least a hour to and from work is not gonna cut it once school starts). 

• Go through the material I have obtain from students who graduated from the law school I am attending.

• Start waking up at 5am (between working and school, I am going to need the time in the morning) – Just Monday-Thursday.

• Buy a laptop.

• Go school supply shopping (I am TOO crunk about this – yes I am a nerd! LOL)

• Rest…

• Work on my Television addiction.

• Establish an exercise routine.
• Go visit the rest of my friends/sorors.
• Get Organized.
• MOST IMPORTANT: Get myself mentally prepared to handle working and the large course load.

I know that there is no “perfect” way to prepare for law school, but I just want to make sure that I have every “i” dotted and every “t’ crossed. This is my “second time around” and I am really trying NOT to make the same mistakes twice. It is one thing to enter into your first year blind and not knowing what to expect, but I know what to expect!!! I know exactly the magnitude of this journey I am about to embark on. The question is, I don’t know if this is a good or bad thing.

For starters, I am wondering…..
• If I should start working on my flashcards for criminal law.
• Obtain horn books/nutshells to read casually over the summer.
• Work on my briefing.
I am not trying to teach myself law or anything like that, but at least I can have a “broad” overview of what I will be studying.

Soooo….. This is what I will be doing this summer along with a TON OF PLEASURE READING. Feel free to check out my other blog about my love of everything books and reading!! http://www.booksnobwannabe.blogspot.com/

A little bit about myself

I am what some people call a super planner or over planner. Basically, I plan too damn much. My planning is so detailed (and sick), that I have to-do lists for to-do lists. EXAMPLE: I have one major “to-do” list for life, and each item on that list has a to-do list. I know, I know, I am doing to much planning and not enough time doing the things on the list. When I was younger I not only imagined what I wanted to do when I grew up, I took it a step (well a couple of steps) further. I envisioned what a daily life would consist of. My life as an attorney, how many kids I would have, the type of man I would marry, the type of house we would buy and in what particular city, the trips I would take as a single and then married woman, and most of all the AGES I would be when I accomplished all of these things.

Now looking back……… nothing is like I imagined. LOL

When we plan or dream about things we want in life, we always fail to include that there will be obstacles. Obstacles that can and maybe will include financial struggles, flunking out of school or quitting school, dead end low paying jobs, sudden deaths, bad relationships etc. At one particular time or other for me, obstacles have been all of the things mentions earlier. However, the one that has had the most impact is the time I flunked out of law school.

There is no one major event that occurred where I just knew I was going to end up flunking out. In addition, I know that flunking out was not because I could not do it, but because I was scare of what the future would bring. I was actually doing the very thing I planned. I was actually putting it into action. This scared me to death. I came to realize that my “to-do” lists were security blankets. I came from an environment where mediocrity was not even required. Therefore, I have always been different because of the dreams I set for myself. I was totally out of my element in law school. Everyone here had big dreams and was in the process of fulfilling them. Here I am watching a picture of my life unfold that is not so much like the one I had when I was a little girl. I kept wondering was I good or smart enough to be here with the rest of the individuals. I did not have enough confidence in God nor me for that matter, and that is just a recipe for disaster. I set myself up for failure. There could be no more talking about what I wanted or planning what I wanted. It had come to the moment where I was to ACTUALLY work towards what I wanted.

It is crazy how I have spent my entire life planning my future, but if given the chance, I would go back and do things differently. ONLY if I knew the things I know now. The past six years were filled with some major highs and lows that are making my twenties the hardest time of my life.

Nevertheless, I truly believe that this experience is my life lesson. One of my favorite quotes is “If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” (Fredrick Douglass) I never had to work hard to succeed. I succeeded at many things in grade school and college but it was never due to hard work. After looking within myself and going over things in my life, I realize that I never experience failure because I never exposed myself to situations where I would fail.

I picked a major in college that was not rocket science. Subjects that I knew that I was not good in (Math and Science), I found out which professors the athletics were taking because I knew that those were the easy professors. I ended up graduating with honors this way. Applying to law school, I rarely studied for the LSAT, but some kind of way I made a decent score and by the grace of God was accepted into law school for the fall 2004 semester. So here I am arriving to law school with the mindset of doing just enough to get by, without having to put myself into the unknown. Not knowing that by just stepping into the building I was stepping into the unknown and coming in with an attitude that was unconsciously setting myself up to fail.

Now, six years later, I am coming to the realization that I had to truly go through the hardest time (flunking) in order to get to know myself and to appreciate what I was actually trying to accomplish. God was giving me my life lesson early. “Nothing worth having in life comes easy.” I needed this lesson in order to fulfill and appreciate my ultimate dream (how can you appreciate anything that did not take effort to obtain), to even realize if I wanted this to be my dream.

When He begin to reveal this to me, His purpose, I began to understand that the obstacles that were being place in my life were really bricks that I will use to one day build the life He has in store for me. I can safely say that I am no longer that scared 21 year old getting by with just doing enough to not step out into the unknown. These days I welcome it. Now do not get me wrong, stepping out into the unknown is still extremely hard, but now I am more equip on how to handle it. When things were unclear, difficult, and confusing, I use to withdraw and break down. Now I know that these moments are just daily lessons. For that reason, in order to receive the “greatness” God has in store for me, I need to be ready for the challenges and the unknown.

So with that I welcome His challenges because now that I am back in law school WITH the addition of working a full time job, there will be plenty of them.

Please join me on my journey:

SECOND TIME AROUND!!!!!!!

Introduction

The moment that I considered going “back” to law school, I knew I would blog about the experience. Many blogs detailing the life of a law school student comes from the point of view of a new incoming 1L. My blog will be from the view of a former law student giving this law school thing one more try. Hence the title of my blog, “2nd Time Around”. This is a great opportunity to share my experiences, opinions, and views. However, I know that I have to be very cautious about what I say. So please respect the fact that I will keep myself as anonymous as possible.

Welcome to my blog!!!!!!