The Semester is over!!! (31 Day Challenge)

FINALS ARE FINALLY OVER!!!

ONE MORE DAY OFF FROM WORK!!!!

So now that school is out for the semester I can get back to doing the normal things in life.  I have so much to blog about.  During the semester, I have come to a major life decision.  Also I am currently participating in a 31 Days to Reset Your Life Challenge and it has been pretty eye opening to say the least. The challenge started on December 1st, so today is the 8th day. 

The purpose of the challenge is to help you:

1. Rediscover your passion and purpose in life.
2. Get clear about your goals for the new year.
3. Create a map for your ideal life.
4. Try new things and live outside of your comfort zone.

I think it is a great way to gain some clarity in your life because I know I sure need some. 

Please stay tune this weekend when I give you a recap on the days 1-10!!!!

FINALS - One more to go.......

Three finals down and one more to go......

What a difference a year makes!!!

This time last year, I thought my world had crumbled.

Last October:

1. I was laid off on 10/6/09.

2. Didn't really have savings because I was just getting even on my monthly bills so I could not afford my apartment with no job or with the severance package they gave.

3. Used the severance package to moved back home to Louisiana and live with my mom.

4. Got a crappy job in my area making (nevertheless very grateful for b/c I didn't have to use up all my severance pay) no money and looking at everybody face I grew up with.

5. Waiting to mail off my law school application and worrying about what my next step was going to be if I did not get in.

This October:

1. Now I am back living on my own (feel like an adult again)

2. Have a job where even though the pay is not great, I am in my field again and most importantly I am gaining experience!!

3. In law school worrying about finals and making it to the next semester!!

Life is seem to be looking good!!

I truly had to believe that everything happens for a reason. That God was just preparing me for the move. For spending time and getting reacquainted with old friends and family members and setting a solid foundation back on old stomping grounds.

When I moved back home a year ago, I thought that showed a sign that I failed. I was so worried about what everyone else thought about me, that I was not focused what I thought of myself. I was giving individuals to much power over me and they did not even realize that they had this power over me. Physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, I was exhausted. I could not get myself together for nothing. I vowed to go into 2010 with a different attitude and that's exactly what I did (to some extent).


2010 brought a new job (not the current one) where I was interacting with individuals in the legal field and obtaining real courtroom experience. It made my quest for a law degree that much stronger. I finally received the acceptance letter and I eventually moved out.

Do I still worry about what people say about me or how I am perceived in their eyes? Sadly I do, but its something that I am working on everyday. Now it is just a different type of people and a different set of standards I feel I failed at. As I interact with more of the people I went to law school with the FIRST TIME, I get to that shameful place again. Nevertheless I can say that its getting better. Technically I don't have time to think about that stuff, I am too busy reading, outlining, and studying. LOL...

Slowly but surely things are getting better.... Do I have my days of "Bre you are f**king up, get it together!!" YES..... However I know that those days come with the terrority of my law school journey. Do I hate working and going to school part time? Yes, but again this is my journey and I cannot compare my journey with anyone else.

That's all folks....... Have you had a year that changed dramatically???? Let me know...

Weight Wednesday - More like nothing Wednesdays

The goal was to be able to walk/run a 5k this Saturday (I want to do at least three in a year's period), but when I found out that my nephew first birthday party and a classmate wedding was going to be on the same day, I knew that I was not going to be able to do it that day.  I have to fit studying in at that time since my entire afternoon is booked and it is my last weekend of freedom (at least until finals). 

With that being said, I still wanted to train, I would just be better prepared for the next one I sign up for.  So with that in mind and the fact that my ex (the ONE) was coming into town.  Mind you I have not saw him in SIX (almost seven) years, I wanted to look my best.

HOWEVER....  I am still at my same weight..... The biggest I have ever been.  For some reason I cannot do it!  I want to really REALLY bad, but something is holding me back mentally.  I thought I had a better grip on this issue (setting goals into motion), but I guess I do not. 

One thing that I have accomplished is eliminating fast food out of my diet and cooking more at home.  I am on my third week of no fast food.  I have not seen a difference in my mood, energy level or weight (still the same size), but I am satisfied that I have gave into going to McDonald's and getting a 10pc nugget meal. 

The time is near....... FINALS

It is getting down to the wire..... I have 29 days before classes end. How am I doing?

Criminal Law 

1. Much better than I thought I was going to do. We are on our 6th hypo with the last two being "gumbo" hypos, which means that it is a scenario with TONS (like 35-40) of crimes in them.

2. I have tackled my first three hypos and created “model” answers for, now I just need to commit them to memory. Which are criminal responsibility, causation, intoxication/insanity and self-defense. I have a lot more to go.

3. My TA for this class has reassured me that I am on the right track so that was encouraging. Lets just hope I can stay on this road....

Contracts

1. Up until now, it was going much worse than I thought it was going to go. I was real excited about this class, but (I think) due to the fact that the book we are using had Damages as the first subject. It took me for a loop. However we have moved on and now I am coming to grips with the new material.

2. At first and probably due to my criminal law professor telling us from day one what he wanted on the final and how he wanted it, I did not know what to expect from her regarding the final. Add in that I did not comprehend the material, I had a recipe of confusion. However everything is slowly coming into place and once I actually give the class the much-needed attention it deserves (because truthfully I have been giving the attention to criminal law), I think I can do wonders in this class.

3. This week or the next one, she will be giving us an "ungraded" midterm. So one class we will take the midterm and next class period we will go over it. Maybe this will help us (b/c I think the entire class is lost) learn what she expects of us regarding the final. After I see the midterm, maybe it will make me more comfortable.

Legal Research & Writing

1. The easiest, hardest class I ever had. LOL.... Seriously...

2. Finished the first draft of the memo. This is 75% of my grade for Legal Writing. I think I am comfortable with it. I have a conference with her to go over it today and I am hoping that I do not have to change a lot of things. I was given this tidbit of advice. COMPLETE THE ENTIRE MEMO so that I can have more input from her. So instead of giving her just the sections that she wanted, I completed the entire thing and I will have more time to work on my weak areas from jump street. I think we get only one more conference with her regarding the memo.

3. I like her teaching method, when she actually does teach. LOL!! It takes a lot of time for her to get her groove and by that time 2 hours have gone by and we only have one left, she tries to cram three hours of lecture into 1. Not good.......

4. With regards to Legal Research, most of that time was spent in the library doing actually legal research using the books. My school pride themselves on teaching their students to use the law library and not just using Westlaw. Actually we are not allowed to use Westlaw until next semester or next year.

5. I have a “Citation” quiz this Thursday, my goal is to ace this because I may need this to balance out the memo grade.

Weight Wednesdays: 100 Push Up Challenge

In addition to my 5k training (which I am loving by the way), I also decided to join the "100 Push Up Challenge".  It is a six week training program where at the end of the six weeks I should be able to do 100 consecutive push ups!  It sounds fun and challenging all at the same time.  Plus I am only using 30 minutes a week to do it.  The website states that push ups improve your strength, fitness and general health. However what really got my attention was how they define your abs.  I have a goal to get me some Ciara abs by the end of the semester or at least by the summer time!  LOL

Before you start the challenge, you have to do an inital test to see what level you will start on.  Of course I am at level one!  Being a top heavy female, I have a lot to push up!  Nevertheless, it is my mission to do 100 push ups by the end of the six weeks.

WISH ME LUCK!!!!

Financial Fridays: Becoming Financially Stable

I finally finally recieved my REFUND CHECK from school!!!  OMG....  I am glad I was working because it really put a strain on my finances getting it so late. 

Every Monday without fail, I wake up and say, "Why the hell am I working AND going to school?  This is hard!!"  Could I make it with just my loan check alone?  Yes, but will it be extremely hard.  Trust me, there is a method behind this madness I am putting myself through. 

Since I just turned 28, I am embarking on a new stage in life.  There is one thing (other than my weight) that needs major improvement.

FINANCES

I can admit that I never been ignorant to the ways of having a good relationship with money and obtaining a  good credit history.  It is just that my past immaturity and lack of career opportunities made it a tough journey/challenge. It was particularly tough because no one taught me to manage my funds.  Thanks to my love of books, I taught myself, but due to the lack of funds, I could never put any of my learning into action.

I am financially coming to terms with knowing that I have to make sacrifices (and actually doing it) for a big return later.  I feel like since I will be in school. this is the perfect time.  My goal is to be debt free except for my car loan (08 Corrolla) and student loans by the time I am 30 (September 2012) or at the latest, by the time I graduate (Spr 13 or 14).

How am I going to do this?  Examining my financial mindset (something I am working on as we speak) and preparing myself for the adjustments and lastly coming to terms that it will not happen over night.

Things I am working on:

1. Setting my financial goals
2. Creating a budget
3. Savings
4. Tracking debt

Twenty eight things to do while I am 28!

Last Thursday I turned 28.  I do not feel any different, other than knowing that I am closer to 30 than 20 is scary.  However I vowed that instead of doing a "things to do before 30" list, I will instead make a list of things to do before my next birthday.  This list range from the small things to huge things I have always wanted to do but never took out the time to do it.  So here goes.......

1. Make at least a 3.0 or better the first year of school.

2. Lose at least 20-30 pounds and KEEP THEM OFF.

3. Take at least one trip out of the state.

4. Have credit card paid off and obtain a “secured” one.

5. Pay off four personal loans from friends and family.

6. Create an IRA

7. Complete car emergency savings.

8. Have AT LEAST one quarter of the emergency savings completed.

9. Establish a vacation savings.

10. Complete “Insanity” AND the “P90X” workout regime.

11. Find a Yoga class and take it.

12. Read a book a month.

13. Run a 5k

14. Become a month AHEAD on every bill.

15. Have credit score move up 50-100 points.

16. Check on “charge off” accounts.

17. Learn how to swim.

18. Get car refinance.

19. Start learning Spanish.

20. Take Tennis lessons.

21. Buy a bike (want to run a triathlon for my 30th)

22. Read Moby Dick

23. Go to at least 2 concerts

24. Get a breast reduction.

25. Attend a professional sporting event (probably New Orleans Hornets vs Orlando Magic)

26. Buy stock into two companies.

27. Attend a Toastmaster’s classes

28. Treat myself to a spa day at an actual spa.

Weight Wednesdays: Plan B

So me and Insanity did not work out!  I under estimated the dedication plus the level of strength needed to take this on.  I am no way in no kind of shape and after hurting my back doing one of the DVDs, I came to realize......maybe I need to take a step back and work my way towards doing this workout out regime!  LOL!! 

So I had the back injury and being burned out due to work, school, and the death of my grandmother, I quit.  I basically bit off WAY more than I could chew. 

Nevertheless.........

Plan B!

I have signed up for a 5k.  Me and a friend/soror will be running (okay maybe walking and running) a 5k on October 30th.  I think that this is an excellent way to build my strength up, get into some kind of shape, and check off step one of my 10 step plan to ultimately participate in a triathlon!!! 

You maybe asking, "Will you quit this too?"  NO!  Why?  I have something motivating me.  An ex boyfriend is coming to town in literally two months and I need to look GREAT!!!  LOL!

With training for the 5k 3-4 times a week and weight training 2 times a week, I should be at my ideal weight by the end of the year!  Cannot wait to go through this journey....... WISH ME LUCK!!!

The Week "END" Review! 8-29-10

Last week's post, after reading it, was very depressing, and after actually picking up the book and reading.  It was not so bad.  I guess I just had a bad case of nerves.

We had our first “official” week of school and I did not start on the right foot because I did not get the appropriate amount of sleep (because I procrastinated and didn’t start studying until 5pm) so by the time I left work and made it to class, I was exhausted.
Funny story – As I was about to leave work and head to campus to get some reading done before class, my boss asked me did I have my books in the car. After replying yes, he requested that I go get them out of the car and go over the cases with him!!!! At first I was like what????? Nevertheless I am so grateful that he took interest because he really help me understand the cases and I felt like, “Ok I think I can do this.” I felt like I comprehended the material and actually went to class with confidence.

I am becoming more confident that I will do well my first semester.  Now that my mental state is getting better, I need to start focusing on my procrastination.  This needs to be eliminated before next weekend.  It is a problem that I am glad I am noticing now.  At the beginning of the week I was thinking that maybe working and going to school is not the best thing for me, but I am wrong.  I am learning a lot at work and all I really need to do is use my time wisely (and truthfully I am not).

OHHHH...  This week has been interesting in the money department.  I try to remain as discrete as possible because I do not want ANYTHING coming back to haunt me, but I can officially say I HATE THE FINANCIAL AID DEPARTMENT.  I just want someone to explain to me how can I do everything in a timely (no EARLY) fashion, and every step of the way I have had issues.  It came to a point this week that it distracted me from concentrating in a seminar that I was attending.  Thank goodness I have a job making a little money or I would be up the street.  The sad thing is that I still don't have my money and don't even know when I am going to get it.  SMH.......

Lastly, a "blast from my past" came to town this weekend.  It was a pleasant surprise to say the least.  It made me aware of how I want a relationship, but how right now..... it would not be possible.  How selfish would I be to try and start something now?  I barely can find time during the week to eat dinner and then my weekends (should) consist of studying.  It would be impossible. 

Next weekend is Labor Day weekend and I wanting to use those THREE days to read ahead and get on the ball. 

Wish me luck!!!

The Week "END" Review! 8-22-10

This week has been the accumulation of six years of anguish, depression, recovery, determination, and redemption. For the past six years, I have been a walking zombie of sorts. Not knowing where I was going or what to do. Just aimlessly roaming here on this planet. Finally, I feel that I am on the path to something; I have a realistic view on my future and not changing it every other year. Knowing that even me is worthy of second chances.

Even with all of this, this week I have came across the same obstacles I encounter six years ago. I am having a hard time picking up the books to even open them up and start to read them. IT’S WEEK ONE PEOPLE and I am stressing over if I can comprehend the material!! It is strange that I can stress over something that has not even happened yet. It is strange that even before opening up a book, I already “assume” that I am not going to comprehend the material. I really need to talk to someone and see why I am like this.

Why did I do all of this (working on myself, reapplying to law school, and being accepted) to only revert right back to the very thing that made me fail? I truly believed that I had changed. Six years ago I didn’t know I had this problem, I didn’t know at the time that I was unconsciously setting myself up for failure because I stepping outside of my comfort zone, now coming into this situation KNOWING that my fear of failure is basically paralyzing me, I don’t know how to fix it.

I do know that it has nothing to do with law school personally; I am dealing with this on my quest to weight lost also.

In a couple of hours, I am going to try ONCE AGAIN, to open up my contract book, read the two chapters I scheduled myself to read and brief the cases inside of these chapters. Then on to Criminal law where I plan to read the first 100 pages and brief cases associated with these pages, then to Legal Writing and Legal Research.

Wish me luck.

Weight Wednesdays - The Insanity Workout

I first found out about Insanity from not being able to sleep one night, there was nothing on TV so when the infomercial caught my attention, I watched it. When finding out it was from the same people who created P90X (which I have and highly recommend to people) and that I had two sorority sisters who did it and received excellent results because of it, I knew I had to have it.

At first I thought I was apart of a great secret (I love feeling like I know of something nobody else knows about), but what I didn’t know was that it very popular and getting more popular by word of mouth.

From the information I have, Shaun T (the person who created it) uses a technique called “Max Interval Training”. You are (in my opinion) basically working out at an extreme pace for a period of time (because to me there is not even a warm up!) and then you take this very short (maybe 30 seconds) break before you start the routine again, this time FASTER!!!! Then once again you take another short break and for the third time, YOU GO EVEN FASTER! Insane huh? My thoughts exactly!

The workout is 60 days long (I officially started Monday, 8/9/10), and being that today is day three, I have no comment other than it is hard as hell and I really am going to have to pray in order to get to the finish line. I keep thinking that I really need to get in shape and get to my desired weight. However, sometime just thinking that is not enough.

With an average of 40 minutes for the first 60 days and an hour the second 60 days, I realize that in order to get the full affect of the workout, I will have to do them first thing in the morning. Maybe it will provide me with the boost I am going to need throughout the day.

I been thinking that I should have started the program at the beginning of the summer so that I could have it finish by now. Now I feel that I am adding this extremely hard workout regime to my schedule as well as work and school. Nevertheless, that is water under the bridge and it is not as if I want to wait and do it after the semester is over. Maybe this is just the thing to keep me focus and my mind off unnecessary (men) things. Wake up, work out, go to work, go to class, study, come home, shower, and go to bed. PERFECT…..

Now what I am sure of is that I am nowhere near physically ready to be doing this workout. Remember, I was waking up tired, but my mission this first go round (yes I am probably going to do this workout regime the entire semester) is to just get through the workout each day. I am not trying to actually “be” Shaun T or the people on the video. If I do that, I will burn out fast and eventually quit (like I done with the P90X). My focus the first round is to learn the moves accurately and gain more energy and stamina. If I do not do it this way, I will bite off more than I can chew and quit.

This the closest I could find to my body type.  Hopefully I get the same (or better) results as she did!

The Week "END" Review! 8-15-10

Well well well........  This week has truly been a roller coaster ride for me!!!!

It started Monday, major drama with the school and with my financial aid.  OMG!!!  What is the purpose of doing everything in a timely fashion when the school and/or administration is not doing what they need to do?? 

Tuesday I received the last of all my books.

By Wednesday, all was good again (regarding financial aid/registration) and then my focus was on the Orientation.

Thursday I was a nervous wreck.  Everyone (family and friends) kept laughing and picking with me saying, "Why are you nervous? Its only orientation!!"  When I made it there it felt like......wow.....I was sitting in this same spot SIX YEARS AGO!  It made me even more aware of what I need to do. 

Friday I caught up with my brother from another mother and was really glad I saw him before he left town and before school.

Saturday.........  I got a tattoo!!! I been wanting one since high school and thank goodness I did not get one then!!!  They would have been real hood and ghetto if I would have got one then.  I always had this thing that I had to think about it for one entire year and if I still wanted it, I would get it.  Well from ages 18-25/26, I could never like the same thing for the entire year.  However for a year and a half, I have really been wanting a particular thing in a particular area.  Yesterday as I was driving, it dawned on me, "it's now or never".  I don't know if it was a good "lawyer" move, but that's what makeup, watches, and bracelets are for!!

I went by myself and just took in the moment. 

I have a new job, how is this going to affect school?

As stated in a previous post, I have been blessed to obtain new employment. It is nothing special, but it is a great stepping-stone to finding a better position once I am out of law school. There are many people asking why am I working and going to school at the same time? There are tons of reasons (well really just three):

1. I cannot afford not to work.
2. I need to work on eliminating debt in order to take the bar. I am not trying to do this on a student loan salary.
3. I have monthly expenses that cannot be taken care of with a semester student loan check.

My problem with the new job is not the job itself, but becoming acclimated to the new settings. I know everyone is nervous when they have a new job, but have anxiety problems. Even after 5-6 months of working, I have extreme bouts of anxiety. It’s pretty bad and it has affects on my performance.

So actually, I need to be acclimated to not only the job, but to working and going to school at the same time. Which means that I have a tough battle ahead of me, but I am not only determine to win this battle, but win the war --- GETTING THROUGH FIRST SEMESTER.

In order to work AND go to school, I need to start right away setting myself up right and on the good foot.

• Learn the ways of law school and the campus. I do not plan to hesitate to ask any question no matter how stupid it may sound to me or the person I am asking. I am getting to the maturity level that I starting not care how smart (intellectual) I sound. The focus is to get through the first semester. I know if I can get through the first, I can graduate!
• Getting to know the administrative staff. Someone I really respect, told me the best folks to get to know is the administrative /support. I have seen how people often mistreat them and later pay for it when these same people go to them for help. These individuals always knows the “who’s who”.
• Maintaining “to-do” lists. From previous posts, I have expressed how much of a “planner” I am. Being that I will be working and going to school, to-do lists are going to be vital. If I do not have one, I will feel like my brain is scattered. NOT A GOOD FEELING.
• Schedule “me time”. FRIDAYS will be my day. NO STUDYING. I plan to use this time to do whatever I want to do. If this means lying in bed all evening after work, that’s what I am going to do. Catching up with DVR shows, reading, blogging, happy hours, talking on the phone with family/friends, etc. Basically even with the heavy schedule I am about to face, I still have to insert some me time in there or I am going to go crazy!!

So what about you? Do any of you have any tips you want to share?

The Week "END" Review! 8-8-10

This week (and last) has been uneventful.  Just getting comfortable and settled into my new job. 

Enjoying the last couple of days I have left before they are consumed with reading and briefing cases. 

Enjoying eating what I want and being lazy before I start the Insanity workout.

Basically this week is my final week of freedom. 

Thursday night I have orientation and to say that I am nervous is an understatement.  I went to a political function last week and while mingling with attorneys, one in particular informed me that this years incoming 1L class was double the size they usually have.  Then they went on to say, "Please be on it, because with a size like that, they will be flunking people left and right."  WTF!!!!  That is not what I needed to hear!!

Now my nerves are really bad.  I am going to use Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday reading over the material they gave us.  We will be placed in groups during some part of orientation and have to discuss each situation.  I think that there are a total of 7, so I will read three tomorrow and two the other nights.

Wish me luck and next Sunday I will be back to tell you about orientation!!!

Weight Wednesdays

On Friday, I discussed that I was working on the following items:

1. Faith
2. A positive attitude
3. Good Health
4. Financial Security.

This post will focus on developing good and better health. I am on a mission to not only to lose weight, but also get in shape. Earlier in life (just like many females) I was extremely skinny and being black, that was not a good thing. Being a senior in high school weighing 90-95 pounds and being 4’11, the only thing I had going for myself was big boobs. I desperately wanted curves and ass like everyone else. After graduating college, I was at a good 110 pounds. Even with the 10-15 pound gain, I still gained no curves and ass. Just a stick with tits……. I did not start to gain weight until January 2004…….hmmmm…..this was at the time I found out that I flunked. Connection???? Maybe so…

Now 6 ½ years later, I have ballooned to 150 pounds!!! Ten years ago this time I was preparing to leave for college any day weighing maybe 95 pounds and stressing because I could not find jeans sized 00. Being that I am 150 pounds, I swear that 10-15 of it is breast, matter of fact, an old doctor of mine told me it was. I was telling him that I wanted to lose weight and he stated, “well only aim for 10 pounds because your breast is at least 10 pounds because of their size.” I cannot believe I have let myself get this way. Now I am in no way fat or anything of that nature, but I am completely unsatisfied with my body and if I am not happy, it is going to project out and cause stress. This is the very thing that is happening. I know my issues with my weight are causing me to make horrible choices in men. However, that is another story for another post.

Now not only am I (in my and BMI opinion) overweight, but I am so out of shape that it is ridiculous. It is as if I wake up feeling tired. I seriously thought something was wrong me because I will lose breathe with just walking a couple of steps or walking up ONE flight of stairs. I was scared. Nevertheless seeing a doctor, I found out that I am anemic. Therefore, now that I have that in order and no longer stressing that something is wrong, I can focus of becoming better health wise.

How am I going to become healthier? By eating better, eliminating fast food and sodas, taking my iron pills for my anemia, taking vitamins, and………..

The Insanity Workout!!

(more on that next week…)

Financial Fridays....

I am thinking about starting a series called....... FINANCIAL FRIDAYS

Since my 28th birthday is coming up in September, I am now more than ever, focusing on becoming the woman I've have always wanted to be.  In order to do this, I need to become more in control with the following things:

1. Faith
2. A positive attitude
3. Good Health
4. Financial Security

During my time in law school, I will be putting myself first.  I will use the remainder of this year to focus on taking the steps needed in order to achieve my goals. 

The two most important ones for the this year is to do extremely well my first semester and to become current AND one month ahead on ALL MONTHLY EXPENSES. 

How am I going to do that?  Of course by using the good ole refund check and continuing to work while I go to school.  The last time I mention employment, I told you guys about the job offer that fell through.  Well guess what????  I have a new job!!!

It is in the legal field and I know that I will gain valuable knowledge (just as I did at my last job) and most importantly, I have very good hours and my boss is very encouraging about me obtaining my law degree.  He even offered to help me regarding course work!!! 

The only negative thing is that I was told one thing regarding my pay, but the pay is actually lower.  Nevertheless I think this place is an excellent fit for my first semester.  It is a great environment where I can get some reading done when there is not a lot to do and I don't have to worry about being interrupted.

However after finals, I will start looking for other employment...... Maybe I will just like it here so much that I would not want to leave...... So knows. 

WE SHALL SEE!!!!

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND

Soon and very soon.......

Orientation is actually ONE MONTH from today!!!

I am getting more nervous as the days go on.... LOL.....

The one question I keep going over in my head is:

Is it better to know what you going into or go into something blindly?

Okay back to the subject at hand, I am about to embark on this great adventure (again) in exactly one month, and you know what?  I have yet to receive any information on what I am suppose to be doing.  Meaning all I know (and this came from the acceptance letter) is that Orientation is on the 12th and Registration will be on the 16th.  HOWEVER no correspondence has arrived as of today informing me of a time or any additional information.  I was worried about this until I made a call to the school and they informed me that I should receive something in July.  So I guess I will have to bug my mom every other day to see if anything has arrived. 

Other than that, the only thing I am focusing on is getting settled into the new apartment.  We get the keys on Friday so basically I am continuing to do what I did over the weekend (other than watch YouTube videos), clean up, organize, and pack.

I don't know how it go at other schools, but at the one I am attending, it crucial that you obtain you some "POOP".  Poop is basically old outlines, notes, and xams from 2Ls and 3Ls.  Particularly from individuals who took the professors that you will be taking.  This is a welcome guide to help you throughout the semester.  It helps you weed out the riff raff early on and not to be studying unnecessary things.  The only thing I recommend is to not accept anybody's poop.  PLEASE make sure that whoever poop you get, they have made a good grade.  Also never pay for this information.  There are some decent individuals out there who are willing to help you, all you need to do in return is to PAY IT FORWARD.

I haven't took a look at them yet, I am staying true to my word.....I am not doing anything (other than enjoying my last days of freedom---as I call it) until the first Monday in August.  There is really no need. 

Lastly, I am going to start working out again.  Get back into the habit of it.  They say 15 days straight of anything becomes a habit.  So this weekend I will go to the park and have a walk and the next 14 days do the same thing.  Slowly incorporate some healthy eating into my life.  Now the only thing I need to figure out is how am I going to figure out my workout schedule once school starts.  Should I work out early in the morning (5:30am)? I am thinking my schedule will be Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights, so should I just work out Thursday-Sunday?  Still trying to figure that out..... 

What do you guys suggest? 

The Week "END" Review! 7-11-10

This week has been interesting... More of a roller coaster ride to be exact.

I learned that the job I was offered is no longer available (well it is no longer available to me!). I was really not given an explanation other than to call HR. This is after the FACT that I was offered the job, took and pass the drug test, criminal background check, AND lie detector exam. Most importantly this was AFTER they told me that I needed to register my car in Louisiana before the week was over (this was on a Monday and had to have it done by that Friday). So here I am trying to come up with $800.00 to register the car, get my Louisiana license back, and to get a Louisiana insurance policy. After all this you tell me, "I am sorry, but the job offer is no longer available to you." WHAT????!!!! Thank goodness I was smart enough to stay at my current job until I was given my start date.

After the anger went away, I started to think that maybe this is a blessing in disguise. Maybe I am right where I am suppose to be. It may not pay well, but other things outweigh that significantly. I can and am making great connections with people in the legal community and I am gaining tons of real life courtroom experience that I would never receive from sitting in a classroom. Basically I am walking in faith because it is obvious that this is where God wants me to be right now and who am I go against that?

In other (good) news......

I will officially be moving closer to work and school Friday!!! I am becoming roommates with one of my closet friends (she has been on this journey with me and been one of my biggest supporters). To say I am excited is an understatement:

1. I will literally be TEN MINUTES (at the most) away from work!!! It has been taking me 2 hours to get to work and at least 1 1/2 hours to get home.
2. 15 minutes from school.
3. No more country life!!!! I will be living in the capital city downtown in the heart of everything!!!

Lastly, I basically spent the weekend packing and being up under my mom.  I had not lived with her since I was 17 and went off to college.  So here I am after 10 years moving back in with my mom, this was a major adjustment for us to say the least.  LOL!!!!  Nevertheless a great one, I would not trade it for the world, but its time for me to go.  SEE YA LATER!!!!

Retrospective - LSAT (Part 2)

Last week in Part One of my "Retrospective - LSAT" story, I gave you guys the beginning of the journey and how the complicated relationship I had with the LSAT exam started.

Soooo.......

After meeting with my department head and getting the encouragement to give law school one more try, I started the necessary steps needed to take the LSAT.  

Now finding a prep course was the tricky part.  I didn't go the normal route (Kaplan and Princeton Review) because I known several individuals who used them and did not get the results they desired (whose fault that is, I don't know).  After looking around and doing research, I found courses being taught at Emory and Georgia State.  They both were being taught by the same individual!!  After I goggled him, I decided that he was the one I wanted to go with.  I picked a class section, paid for it, submitted my reimbursement sheet to HR, and waited for the class to start.

Two months later......  Classes begun.

Tuesdays and Wednesdays I was going to Georgia State University for my LSAT prep course.  THANK GOD I went with this prep course.  The teacher was funny and very much down to earth and really took the time to help everyone learn the tricks and the trade behind the LSAT.  It was him that inform me that there was no such thing as "studying" for the LSAT, instead we need to start "practicing" it.  Going to class was wonderful!  I loved parking in the parking garage near the school (because I stop parking where they told us - it was too expensive) and walking towards the school.  I started picturing myself actually being in school coming there for my classes.  I was really speaking it into existence!!!!

Being in class was great, it was trying to "practice" outside class that was the kicker....  For some reason I could not get it together to pick up any of the LSAT material outside of the class setting.  It was NOT for the lack of trying.  I definitely tried, but something was mentally holding me back.  I started to feel a lot of pressure to make sure that I do well on the exam.  To many people from my job knew what I was doing  and I kept thinking that if I mess this up, everybody is going to know and I will fall right into the hands of some of the individuals I work with (some were actually wanting me to fail).  I am really hard on myself and nothing I was doing was enough.  Studying.....I mean practicing for this exam really had my head gone.  I would basically get up on Saturdays, drive to the library (had too many distractions at home), find an area and get comfortable, open up the book, and basically break down.  Random people coming to my cube asking is everything is okay, and honestly I didn't know if everything was okay.  I could not for the life of me understand what was going on. 

So as I sit at the library (or coffee shop or bookstore), trying my damnest to hide that fact that I am having a mental break down in public, I am thinking to myself, "What the hell is going on?"   I decided that it was time to see someone. 

I found a therapist and after several sessions, we (okay she) came to the conclusion that I was not afraid of failure, but afraid of success.  She found that I knew that I was a brilliant individual and could do anything I want if I put my mind to it, but if putting my mind towards something is going to take me outside of my comfort zone, I am (and will and have) going to self sabotage myself!!!  DING DING DING!!!

This is EXACTLY what I did in law school!!!

So after several assignments given by her for me to do, I became comfortable embracing actually doing the things I want to do in life.   After getting to the real reason for why I could not pick up the LSAT book outside of the classroom, practicing for the LSAT got a little easier to do. I actually started understanding what I was doing. 

Some may say, "Wow you went through all that just with the test!  What is wrong with you?"  It was not about the test, I was basically doing the same thing I did in law school six years ago.  I needed to go through that journey so that I could get the help I needed so that when I start law school in less than 40 days, I will not get another letter in January saying that I have flunked out!!!

Retrospective - LSAT (Part 1)

Last year this time I had just took the LSAT and was waiting for the results!! 

WHAT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES!!!!

My history with the LSAT is a long and complicated relationship.  Some people like to say that they had a love/hate relationship with it.  Not me, I have a hate/hate relationship with the sucka!!

Back when I was a junior in college (2002/2003) and decided that law school was the next step in my quest for world domination (okay maybe that was too much LOL), I headed to the Internet to see what steps I needed to take in order to attend law school.  I obtain this wonderful timeline (which is a great thing for planners) and one of the first items was this thing called "Law School Admissions Test".  So me being the nerd that I am, I read up on EVERYTHING LSAT and headed to the book store to obtain a LSAT study book. 

In January 2003, I went to the LSAC website and registered for the June 2003 exam.  When did I decide to study for this exam?  TWO WEEKS BEFORE THE EXAM!!!!  I didn't know this back then, but there is NO SUCH THING as studying for this exam.  Nevertheless I aced it!!  Well...... not necessarily aced it, but I did receive the highest score out of all of the people who I went to college with.  If you know what  I made, I don't know what that says about my college and/or the people that go to it.  LOL!!

Sooooo five years later in 2008, I decided that I am really serious about going back to law school.  I did my due diligence and found out that I needed to take the exam again.  Once again I registered for the exam and once again I did NOTHING to prepare myself.  I convinced myself that I was ready to ace this exam.

I was like, "Hey!  I didn't prepare myself last time and I did okay, I should be okay this time. Right?"

No.  I did horrible,  actually the worst you can do, I did THAT...... I was so ashamed of myself and was actually convincing myself that it was time to give up this law school dream and move on to something else.

In the beginning of 2009, I was having my "annual work evaluation" meeting, and the new person over my department wanted to know a little about me.  After the obvious things (family, college, hobbies), we went on to discuss my short attendance in law school.  I went on to give her the scripted version (I had a lot things going on at the time and I decided to just sit out for awhile), but for some reason she could sense the bulls**t.  Without saying that I was a liar, she made me comfortable enough with her that for the first time I was honest and could actually say it out loud, "I flunked out of law school".

Then she said something that just clicked, but for some reason, I cannot remember the exact quote, LOL!!  All I can say is that after that meeting I came out with a new mind frame! Especially since she offered to pay (well have the company pay) for me to take the exam AGAIN and to pay for a prep course.  I never had someone (outside of family and friends) have such confidence in me.

Now this is when my journey REALLY BEGAN....

STAY TUNED FOR PART TWO!!!!

Summer before school starts - What shall I do???

With summer officially starting tomorrow and less than 60 days until school starts (56 to be exact), I feel I have so much to do!!

• I need to sit down and establish a concrete budget and stick to it.

• Get adjusted to the new job I will start some time this month or at the beginning of July.

• Establishing a better work wardrobe.

• Move in with my friend (driving at least a hour to and from work is not gonna cut it once school starts). 

• Go through the material I have obtain from students who graduated from the law school I am attending.

• Start waking up at 5am (between working and school, I am going to need the time in the morning) – Just Monday-Thursday.

• Buy a laptop.

• Go school supply shopping (I am TOO crunk about this – yes I am a nerd! LOL)

• Rest…

• Work on my Television addiction.

• Establish an exercise routine.
• Go visit the rest of my friends/sorors.
• Get Organized.
• MOST IMPORTANT: Get myself mentally prepared to handle working and the large course load.

I know that there is no “perfect” way to prepare for law school, but I just want to make sure that I have every “i” dotted and every “t’ crossed. This is my “second time around” and I am really trying NOT to make the same mistakes twice. It is one thing to enter into your first year blind and not knowing what to expect, but I know what to expect!!! I know exactly the magnitude of this journey I am about to embark on. The question is, I don’t know if this is a good or bad thing.

For starters, I am wondering…..
• If I should start working on my flashcards for criminal law.
• Obtain horn books/nutshells to read casually over the summer.
• Work on my briefing.
I am not trying to teach myself law or anything like that, but at least I can have a “broad” overview of what I will be studying.

Soooo….. This is what I will be doing this summer along with a TON OF PLEASURE READING. Feel free to check out my other blog about my love of everything books and reading!! http://www.booksnobwannabe.blogspot.com/

A little bit about myself

I am what some people call a super planner or over planner. Basically, I plan too damn much. My planning is so detailed (and sick), that I have to-do lists for to-do lists. EXAMPLE: I have one major “to-do” list for life, and each item on that list has a to-do list. I know, I know, I am doing to much planning and not enough time doing the things on the list. When I was younger I not only imagined what I wanted to do when I grew up, I took it a step (well a couple of steps) further. I envisioned what a daily life would consist of. My life as an attorney, how many kids I would have, the type of man I would marry, the type of house we would buy and in what particular city, the trips I would take as a single and then married woman, and most of all the AGES I would be when I accomplished all of these things.

Now looking back……… nothing is like I imagined. LOL

When we plan or dream about things we want in life, we always fail to include that there will be obstacles. Obstacles that can and maybe will include financial struggles, flunking out of school or quitting school, dead end low paying jobs, sudden deaths, bad relationships etc. At one particular time or other for me, obstacles have been all of the things mentions earlier. However, the one that has had the most impact is the time I flunked out of law school.

There is no one major event that occurred where I just knew I was going to end up flunking out. In addition, I know that flunking out was not because I could not do it, but because I was scare of what the future would bring. I was actually doing the very thing I planned. I was actually putting it into action. This scared me to death. I came to realize that my “to-do” lists were security blankets. I came from an environment where mediocrity was not even required. Therefore, I have always been different because of the dreams I set for myself. I was totally out of my element in law school. Everyone here had big dreams and was in the process of fulfilling them. Here I am watching a picture of my life unfold that is not so much like the one I had when I was a little girl. I kept wondering was I good or smart enough to be here with the rest of the individuals. I did not have enough confidence in God nor me for that matter, and that is just a recipe for disaster. I set myself up for failure. There could be no more talking about what I wanted or planning what I wanted. It had come to the moment where I was to ACTUALLY work towards what I wanted.

It is crazy how I have spent my entire life planning my future, but if given the chance, I would go back and do things differently. ONLY if I knew the things I know now. The past six years were filled with some major highs and lows that are making my twenties the hardest time of my life.

Nevertheless, I truly believe that this experience is my life lesson. One of my favorite quotes is “If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” (Fredrick Douglass) I never had to work hard to succeed. I succeeded at many things in grade school and college but it was never due to hard work. After looking within myself and going over things in my life, I realize that I never experience failure because I never exposed myself to situations where I would fail.

I picked a major in college that was not rocket science. Subjects that I knew that I was not good in (Math and Science), I found out which professors the athletics were taking because I knew that those were the easy professors. I ended up graduating with honors this way. Applying to law school, I rarely studied for the LSAT, but some kind of way I made a decent score and by the grace of God was accepted into law school for the fall 2004 semester. So here I am arriving to law school with the mindset of doing just enough to get by, without having to put myself into the unknown. Not knowing that by just stepping into the building I was stepping into the unknown and coming in with an attitude that was unconsciously setting myself up to fail.

Now, six years later, I am coming to the realization that I had to truly go through the hardest time (flunking) in order to get to know myself and to appreciate what I was actually trying to accomplish. God was giving me my life lesson early. “Nothing worth having in life comes easy.” I needed this lesson in order to fulfill and appreciate my ultimate dream (how can you appreciate anything that did not take effort to obtain), to even realize if I wanted this to be my dream.

When He begin to reveal this to me, His purpose, I began to understand that the obstacles that were being place in my life were really bricks that I will use to one day build the life He has in store for me. I can safely say that I am no longer that scared 21 year old getting by with just doing enough to not step out into the unknown. These days I welcome it. Now do not get me wrong, stepping out into the unknown is still extremely hard, but now I am more equip on how to handle it. When things were unclear, difficult, and confusing, I use to withdraw and break down. Now I know that these moments are just daily lessons. For that reason, in order to receive the “greatness” God has in store for me, I need to be ready for the challenges and the unknown.

So with that I welcome His challenges because now that I am back in law school WITH the addition of working a full time job, there will be plenty of them.

Please join me on my journey:

SECOND TIME AROUND!!!!!!!

Introduction

The moment that I considered going “back” to law school, I knew I would blog about the experience. Many blogs detailing the life of a law school student comes from the point of view of a new incoming 1L. My blog will be from the view of a former law student giving this law school thing one more try. Hence the title of my blog, “2nd Time Around”. This is a great opportunity to share my experiences, opinions, and views. However, I know that I have to be very cautious about what I say. So please respect the fact that I will keep myself as anonymous as possible.

Welcome to my blog!!!!!!